Thursday, October 16, 2008

A Letter Of Longing

Friday's conversation left me with even more thoughts of you as I awoke on Saturday. Cher, sweetheart you changed my schedule for the day. You turned my entire day around... work was put aside for the first time in a long while. I had to escape the routine I am accustomed to... to discover my heart and my direction.

I was headed to the office only to realize the ocean was calling from me to seek you... to the place I have gone in days gone by to find you. Taking the train, you know the one, the one that lands you near the water's edge just beyond the highway.

I searched for paper in a pocket, took out my pen, strolled the beach and as I walked I penned these words...

Today I seek you to fulfill my thoughts. Baby, I walk along where the ocean meets the shore seeking all that reminds me of you, of us, of you. In the footprints embedded in the moist summer sand, where the tide has not yet reached, I imagine you have walked ahead, waiting for me to follow.

Broken sand dollars strewn across the sand I see broken promises made to a woman so dear, value of a life remains the same, yet gone unnoticed by the selfish ones, those devoted unto themselves. Shattered dreams embedded in the sand.

Just ahead, happy children's faces full of delight and discovery, laughter and innocence, draws me to ponder those days when we were young, how the world was ours. Nothing stood in the way of our dreams, our hopes for the future. Imaginary worlds we created where life was our joy, our tomorrow.

Passing a sand sculpture creator... a woman carved from the silica and minerals, his fantasy lady splayed for the combers to see. I stood there for a moment without comment, wanting it to come to life, call my name only to see you there. I turned away to seek that secret place where I have found you once on that winter shore. A time I desired you, whispering against the ocean spray, calling your name, listening for your voice, I found you there.

I have made it that peaceful, loving place. The place where four boulders emerge majestically from the sea, below the Cliff House, a place of solitude... the sea, the vast expanse of water... I am here to call for you. The pelicans look curiously on, the waves crash against the great weathered rock, millions of ages past carving into its surface, smooth like your skin... I lie against it, seeking its sun given warmth. Hear the ocean, hear the sound of two hearts transcending time and distance... I hear you there.

The ocean drips from my body, staining the ancient stone... I am alone with thoughts of you only, and the indescribable solitary beauty of this place... I await your heart from words spoken the evening before. You speak to my beginning, the part of me that was once you... my soul.

From this ocean we once were... splitting energy seeking to discover and to join anew in another time, another place. We found ourselves drawn to this place, this place amid the celestial expanse. The sea, the cradle of our lives here so many lifetimes ago, our home, I call out for you. On the breath of the breeze, you rush across my flesh, you are now here...

Captivated, you capture my mind, shadow my senses, I lie here only to welcome you, embrace my mind, reach deep within my thoughts, let me breathe your presence, bathe me with you.

The tide has changed, my day with you fulfilled... I leave this ancient stone amid the sea.

The phone rings... it is you!



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